"Lo, I Come."

Luke 15:11-32

Then Jesus said, “There was a man who had two sons. 12 The younger of them said to his father, ‘Father, give me the share of the property that will belong to me.’ So he divided his property between them. 13 A few days later the younger son gathered all he had and traveled to a distant country, and there he squandered his property in dissolute living. 14 When he had spent everything, a severe famine took place throughout that country, and he began to be in need. 15 So he went and hired himself out to one of the citizens of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed the pigs. 16 He would gladly have filled himself with[c] the pods that the pigs were eating; and no one gave him anything. 17 But when he came to himself he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired hands have bread enough and to spare, but here I am dying of hunger! 18 I will get up and go to my father, and I will say to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you; 19 I am no longer worthy to be called your son; treat me like one of your hired hands.”’ 20 So he set off and went to his father. But while he was still far off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion; he ran and put his arms around him and kissed him. 21 Then the son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you; I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’[d] 22 But the father said to his slaves, ‘Quickly, bring out a robe—the best one—and put it on him; put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. 23 And get the fatted calf and kill it, and let us eat and celebrate; 24 for this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found!’ And they began to celebrate. 25 “Now his elder son was in the field; and when he came and approached the house, he heard music and dancing. 26 He called one of the slaves and asked what was going on. 27 He replied, ‘Your brother has come, and your father has killed the fatted calf, because he has got him back safe and sound.’ 28 Then he became angry and refused to go in. His father came out and began to plead with him. 29 But he answered his father, ‘Listen! For all these years I have been working like a slave for you, and I have never disobeyed your command; yet you have never given me even a young goat so that I might celebrate with my friends. 30 But when this son of yours came back, who has devoured your property with prostitutes, you killed the fatted calf for him!’ 31 Then the father[e] said to him, ‘Son, you are always with me, and all that is mine is yours. 32 But we had to celebrate and rejoice, because this brother of yours was dead and has come to life; he was lost and has been found.’”

A few weeks ago my housemates and I were saying Morning Prayer together. The psalm for the day was Psalm 40, and one of the verses ended with the words, “Lo, I come.” Those simple words struck me. They reminded me of a hymn, but I couldn’t place it. I hummed the words to myself off and on all day, trying to jolt my memory. I said them in a sing-song way at various speeds, and even in different octaves, trying to remember, but I never did recall the hymn. By the next morning I had forgotten, and moved on with my usual daily tasks.

Last week I found myself taking an unexpected trip home to Montana due to a family emergency. My mother suffers from depression and my presence was needed with my family. It was a stressful trip where sorrow and uncertainties were found. Although due to unfortunate circumstances I was happy I had the opportunity to worship at my home parish with my family. Greeting new and old friends, smelling the wood of the reliable and sturdy church pews, and seeing my beloved stained glass windows all brought me great joy.

However, just when I thought I had found all the sacred that could fit in that place I was taken by surprise, which seems to be God’s greeting of choice. As I ventured into the aisle to make my way up for communion I heard the words I had been searching for weeks ago, “Just as I am, though tossed about with many a conflict, many a doubt; fighting and fears within, without, O Lamb of God, I come, I come.” Tears rolled down my cheeks, and I began to sing with the rest of the congregation as we kneeled together at the altar rail. Lamb of God, we come. We come kneeling before you empty and weak, drained of strength to face the hardships of life. We come to you in the freedom of knowing who we are: the prodigal son and daughter. The lost sheep who out of shame, doubt, or arrogance wandered from our ninety nine brothers and sisters thinking we could make it on our own. We come with sheer joy at your welcoming embrace. Realizing we could never earn it, only that we need ask. O Lamb of God, we come, we come.

--Reagan Grabbe, Resurrection House Intern, St. Andrew's, Omaha